People ask how I'm holding up now that my mom transcended out of this earthly realm on March 12, 2014.

It's weird. When someone asks my eyes fill with tears.  This past week I've noticed that at night when I get up to walk to the kitchen in the dark I think I'm gonna see her walking into the bathroom at midnight for her usual pee time, but she's not there. I look at the chair she sat at to eat her meals and drink her tea and I miss her. The fashion magazines that she used to look at over and over again are still on the coffee table they haven't been moved. Every night I see the vivid picture left in my mind of when she was crying in agony because she didn't want to leave us behind. She adored her daughters and the love she has for us was so immense that it made her brave enough to hold on as long as she possibly could because our love it was kept her here.

Life goes on and days slip away, there is always something to do, somewhere to go, something that needs attention and so I am desperate to get out of town and go to Mount Shasta for a few days and just be with the energy of nature and the earth, the sounds of the universe in the stillness and quiet, so that I can feel my inner child and console her and hold her and tell her that she did a good job and that she is loved, she is loving and she is powerful and brave just like her momma was and ever shall be.

In gratitude,

Zoe